Gen Y?

I read with somewhat disgust this article: GenY The Star , about GenY. It's nice to hear from a Gen Y perspective and I have an opinion as to why they are like that, quite contrary to what the article says.

Trying to get the restaurant's kitchen to open up just to cook for you brats? That's just plain inconsiderate. And perhaps because the brat that you are, you probably have not worked in a restaurant before where although you think that you've worked hard and deserve a decent meal at a restaurant, those people who work in the restaurants also worked the whole day only to wait for the 10pm last call so they too can call it a day and have their decent meals? Being the inconsiderate lot that those brats are, of course that never crossed their minds! only me, me, me.

"Gen X was a time where education was a rare privilege, a job was a blessing and praises were hard to come by.
My comrades and I were raised to believe in ourselves, to strive for the best and to fight for what we believe in. Perhaps that makes us a little over-confident and too vocal in voicing our desires and displeasures."
Quite the contrary to what this article says about GenX, I do believe GenX in fact believe in themselves more because of our struggle and our plight. That's because we struggled to get where we are. GenY make think that they are over-confident and too vocal, but really empty vessels make the most noise! And it doesn't take long for people to realize that.

"If we feel that we’re performing well, we would rather like appreciation to be shown sooner rather than later."
This is only applicable if you actually perform well. And really you cannot force someone to appreciate your work, because though you think you have performed well, you may not have performed exceptionally well or others could have done better. So really it's not a real recognition unless people collectively tells you so. More often that not, I find them complaining before getting any work done. Don't even talk about performance yet.

"The world is changing to adapt to Gen Y because we are the future, but no one is going to tolerate or find excuses for a spoiled brat. The question is this: If you were the boss, would you employ yourself?"
I must say this is the best part. I dont think however the world is changing to adapt to Gen Y but rather to cater for different genres, as you are aware, there are more generations after GenY, be it the Millenials etc. With raising the retirement age from 55 to 60 in private sectors, there is a further need to be more flexible.

Living with others

Sharing a space with anyone is no easy feat, be it your siblings, your parents, your in laws, your friends or your boyfriend / husband. There are those things like who gets the remote control, who does the washing, who gets to do the laundry first, who pays the bill, who takes out the trash..., and those are the easy stuff because those things you can sort it out with a schedule or a mutual understanding. Living with other people also means you need to be TOLERANT. You need to be sensitive with your words especially with elderly people because sometimes things get misinterpreted. You Ned to be sensitive to other people's religion and daily rituals. Especially toilet rituals. Especially if u only have 1 toilet. Believe me, I have had a history of living with people who spend a lot of time at the loo.

The hardest part is to stay sensitive to others all the time. Home is a place where u unwind, take off your bra literally, be free but it's hard when you have others living with you. There used to be a time when I just wanna stay in my room all day because in there, that is MY space. If you have a roommate well then that is a different story! Sometimes you will have to pretend he/she is not there especially if she is someone you cant get along with!

What are your tips to living with others?

Mom

My mom is the most amazing mom. I have always thought of writing about her but really I don't know where to begin. She is an icon of strength, thoughtfulness, zen, love,bravery, chivalry , everything. I really pale in comparison to my mom. She is courageous, at 65 she is the ringleader at most of the places that we have stayed at: Ipoh, ara damansara, Taman desa, , Singapore. She has a knack for making friends because of her don't-be-a-stuckup attitude. Whenever she makes a trip back to Ipoh she will buy car load of taugeh and heongpeng to distribute them to the neighborhood. I used to find it a real bother but then I realize it takes a lot of thought and generosity that I guess I could never measure up to.

Andrew once sAid to me that I should get cooking lessons dorm my mom so that the legacy doesn't end. My mom cooks up a storm everyday! She has a way of being creative so she would throw in a few surprises every now and then. On the table you will not only find my dad and mine and my sister's favorite dish but also andrew's and my bil's. It can be quite a feat, add on my nephew's and doing that every day. But she bulldozes on with enthusiasm and drive. She does all the marketing alone because we would just slow her down, and even a cousin of my bil saw her once at the market and applauded her powerful arms! Yeah, we are a bunch of lame ninnys compared to her.

Perhaps it was her upbringing. Slaughtering chickens at the age of 10 and taking care of my uncle when she was still a kid. She told me she took my uncle to register for school when she was 9 or 10. And would cycle to deliver his lunch to him. I dunno if it's a hainanese thing or not, but my mom really takes care other family, her cousins and etc etc. My mom keeps close to her cousins till today, often the one driving them to seremban, Melaka etc on a day trip. Right now, my mom is in Singapore because and uncle was diagnosed with cancer and she is helping out my aunt cooking and doing banking for him. Shen she arrives this morning ( 5 hours bus ride, mind you) she is off gallivanting
with a cousin and meeting some friends for lunch. Sometimes even hearing her programme for the day is exhausting. Here is a woman who went to Ipoh, then to betong Thailand to the communist camp for a dinner and stayed overnight before heading back to kl the next day.

Just last week was the tangling festival and my mom just by word of mouth and her pulling the crowd around ara damansara, organized one of the biggest one I have ever attended. She got a few old aunties to commit to bringing their grandchildren and food so the night was set and we saw about 100+ people turned up for the event. My sister's neighbor told me that they thought it would be cancelled because it was raining and the plan was to have it at the two big badminton court at the playground, but lo and behold, she caught my mom sweeping the water off the badminton court with a steady broom alone not wanting the kids to slip and also for the candles to stick on the floor. Amazing right. I justhada potluck at work in which it took me few weeks to get people to buying food whilst my mom only took 1 weekend to organize one. Haha!

The way I described my mom you probably think she is must be just other auntie. But she was also a teacher. Her methods are quite unorthodox so I grew up with troubled cousins being sent to my mom for training. Yeah a cousin of mine was sent from Sri petaling all, the way to Ipoh for a good 4 years to whip him to shape. And never once did she whack him although I certainly instigated it haha! Me and my twin were sent to the church, cathedism classes, temple etc, wanting us to get exposure to different religion. When I was about 4 yrs old, my house had 10 people ; an Indian man who was my dad's former student, and 2 children of my mom's friend from teluk intan, and the 6 of us plus my grandma. U can imagine how chaotic life was. To date the Indian man always tells me my mom is his half -sister. In a way she probably thought us about sharing and racism in a very surreal way.

My niece and nephew are very attached to her. Her devotion and because of the flurry of activities that my mom always carry with her, the kids I would say have a great childhood, always surrounded by friends and doing a mix of traditional activities and modern ones that my sisters would provide. They are both free spirits as my mom tend to let them be not wanting to suppress them.

I hope I can be half as good as her.

Bad meals

I seriously get really pissed off with so called food bloggers who for the sake of free meals give good reviews for bad food. It is irresponsible and lack of integrity. I dunno, I take pride in what I write about and what my opinions are in anything , especially if you are gonna blog about it. And so, I am going to start dedicating space to write about bad meals introduced by food bloggers. Although some are really subjective to one's taste bud, there are really some that are so outright bad that no way a person could ever stomach. Here are some to begin with.

1) Betty Midwest Kitchen Aman Suria- honestly it tasted like scraps of leftovers that I used to prepare during my UNI days.
2) Coffee Chemistry Giza Mall - this was seriously mediocre and really not worth mentioning of.
3) Full House anywhere- seriously the food is so mediocre and taste like microwaved food that it really does not deserve a mention at all. Somehow bloggers seem to really love to publicize it.
4) Wong Kok - gross and overrated. Bad coffee and tea.

The list goes on. Want to knowwho r the bad bloggers, google these places and find out who thinks these are great food!

Where are your manners arh?

It's a whole week of organizing events, somehow got caught into it and well you know the part u gotta wait for people to RSVP, sending reminders etc etc. So there is a potluck I am organizing for my dept, and you have to make sure people don't bring the same stuff and make sure there is enough dessert, kuih, and the heavy works. Despite sending reminders and asking for confirmation on the type of food to bring...it's already tues and the event is coming Monday, way way past the deadline already which was 2 weeks ago. It wouldn't bother me so much if boss wasn't asking me for the list of food, attendance confirmation etc. People don't realize I don't do this full time ok. I still got 'real' work to do. They disrespect deadlines and expect me to chase them. You know on outlook people can accept, decline, and out on tentative their attendance? At one point I wrote to all the attendees who hv not confirmed and put on tentative that they can only accept or decline. no more tentative!

And then there is this other event. It's an annual meeting I am helping to organize and we have to get the suppliers to confirm participants and provide parking registration as well. People just do not READ! It says 2 participants per company and people happily give me 3 names. Or they don't give you the parking registration info. Or if they reply, they rudely just give you the car plate number. Not even the Hi or a Thanks.

I think it's just simple manners to give timely decision and doing it politely at the same time. I can't wait for their turn to organize something then they would understand how annoying they can be!

Ignorance is not an excuse

One of Andrew's friend got registered for marriage yesterday. His then wife-to-be was to deliver next week. more or less. Why did they waited for so long I wonder. Granted, the guy is not exactly the appropriate type, and neither is the wife. Yet, if they had decided to bring a child into this world, why risk it. Andrew says perhaps they are ignorant. Perhaps. But it's not an excuse. I pity the child. She did not ask to be born into a dysfunctional family if you could even call it a family. The guy obviously did not give two hoots that he was going to be a father next week. People who are illiterate would have had more common sense. You don't need a degree to have a common sense. even Ahbengs and Ahlians would love their child. He does not belong to any category, except for the category of scums who do not deserve a child.

A beginning

Stay tuned. A beginning of a new life! It will all be made known in 5 weeks time.

Lunch

It's true that we spend the most hours in our lives at work whether we like it or not. But lunch has always been a highlight for me.i am sure a lot of ex-colleagues and current colleagues would tell you that I am always the one to prompt everyone to makan. Hehe. Highlight of a usually serious and lonely hours at work. A break that we all much needed after sieving through endless emails. Truly, it is for me the best time of the day! At work at least.....

Although I have had my share of lonely lunches.... All throughout my career until now I suppose. After customer and supplier site visits, or when I was a consultant, when you always had to make new friends before you get lunch partners. Honestly, I love those lonely lunches too. First I get to choose where and what I want to eat, and I know I am rather picky. And I get to people watch and really it is quite an enjoyable activity, haha.

Well, of course it is never good to be an anti-social so I always try to build new lunch partners and routines. I must say it is rather important to get good kakis else I would really rather just be on my own. I for one do not like to talk about work during lunch, talk cock sing song anything, just please don't talk about this email that email. Luckily I have in the past made some great lunch company and loved my lunches!

Now breakfast is a different story..it is my me time :) ....err also because I get to work at 7.15am so no one is at work yet. Haha.

33

Feels the same when I was 30 really.. Staying at the same place. New job but the same old thing anyways, it's still not my own business haha. Gained a lot of weight but don't really mind it too much. Friends that matter are still my friends and we are close despite distance and new family commitments. I am thankful for my family and husband, for too many things. I probably did most of the things I set out to do in these few years. I don't really have a long list or a 10 yr plan, I tend to make things up as I go along. Life 's too hard so why want to be harder on yourself. That's my thought anyways. Its like saving for your pot of gold, it will never be enough.... Or trying to be a significant leader in your company, the higher you go, you will always want something more or at an even bigger company.

I would rather work on small milestones. Like go on at least 1 overseas trip a year. It didn't matter if it was just Thailand. And one girls only vacation a year. Go on one family trip per year. Getting a new car before my kelisa fails on me, oh I miss him. Generate another side income , that's still not done yet but not unachievable.

Anyways I know a lot of my friends have some sort of things that they have mapped out to do before 35 like getting married or being a parent or making 10k a month. Not everything will fall through and there are bound to be some disappointments but that's ok! We shouldn't let age define our milestones and happiness. Eg if you were to only find your lifetime partner when you are 45, is that not better than settling for a guy you have some doubts of at 35.

So happy birthday to me and my twin. Life is good only if you nourish and cherish it.

A breakkk

We are in Chiangmai today. Decided to keep things simple and just chill for a few days here. Andrew is having a massage while I idle myself away in a nice shop having a kiwi smoothies. Simple pleasures I think weiyin could relate to. Hehe. We walked all over Chiangmai today but not particularly looking for anything, not like in the past when we would really hunt and track down those sights. U see, there is nothing much in Chiangmai except for temples and temples (350 of them).... And that is the whole idea. Just a break from it all and away from all the hustle and bustle of kl. And especially away from the office desk! Ok, ciao now. Chill and hv a kit kat if u must.

Intolerable

"Intolerance betrays want of faith in one's cause"- Mahatma Gandhi.

There's this change going on in my department. Work's being reshuffled around and we have timelines, get it done and move on to your new role. While no one is big on CHANGE, I've been through too many changes in most of my workplace to know that you've gotta do what you've gotta do else you'll just have to ship out, but it's not any rosier elsewhere. We have to stay lean and that's all there is to it. In the past, we don't give much thought to it. Just get going and do it. Because we understood. Staying lean is all that matters because that's what helps to keep you EMPLOYED.

But not this company. People have been spoilt. People are ignorant to the global recession that is looming towards us. While it's good to make the best of it and try to carve a better workplace for yourself, it should not be at the expense of others. It gets intolerable when it affects my work. While I would rather move on and have the transition done asap, others are taking a stroll, stalling for a hidden agenda. It didn't really bother me at first, but when one starts to churn excuse after another, now that's just unprofessional. Postponing and avoiding meetings, throwing new 'info' that only further stalls the transition, I mean that is just so 'low' and not to mention plain immature.

And why do I say people are spoilt. I went through recession without any pay increment, no bonus for 2 years. And to be moved project after project in different locations for different clients, for 3 years. In another company for 2 years, I commuted few times in a day to 2 different plants with no additional allowance. My work has always been ever changing and really we just need to embrace it.

Nobody likes to go to work like you're on a battlezone. Everyone has lost their objective just like any war. I just want to get on with my work, but yeah, intolerance is getting in the way. But what do i do? I could complain. Or I could try to reason out, but the hidden agenda would make all dicussion infutile anyways. I have made sure I send my point across though. Like it or not.

Old Friends

I met WY today and it's been almost 6 months since we last met. But the funny thing about old friends is that we immediately get into our childish mode when we meet. Never mind that it's in the office (and a rather serious one I must add). I knew her when we were 13 for god's sake. Makes me forget that I am a grown 33 year old , a wife and a 'worker'. We exchanged stories and really at some point I think it made me remember those carefree days at the lower hall and me, WY and imn were sitting idly talking rubbish waiting to get into class. Yar that's the effect some friends have on me. Like when SC called me last week. She is someone I sat with halfway through form 1 because I was too noisy. We never were in the same school after form 5 but our friendship prevails till today. Odd right? Same as for Wawa. We found a brilliant way to call each other last Friday and that can be hard on a different time zone but we did it anyways and it was like gossiping over coffee of the day all over again. I guess nothing comes without effort. If you feel you are falling out from your friends, ask yourself if you have really neglected them. Some friends understand that you have your obligations and trust that when they need you the most you'd be available anyways. I like to think that I can be that kind of friend. Not just a friend to hang out with. But a friend you can count on.

One or Two?

One of my colleague told me that parents who opt for having only one child are selfish. I ask why. He said that well it's selfish because the kid would not have any playmates and would grow up as a lonely child and to face the world alone after the parents are gone. I never thought of it that way. 'but it could be because people can't afford more than one kid these day' I tried to explain. He said well that is just nonsense because people of our parents generation used to have more than two children and they did just fine. And we are supposedly better off now comparatively. 'but people also marry late these days, hence it could also be a fertility issue' I said. His answer is simply why wait. I do know some people who were so sure they would not have kids...ever. But accidents happen and they bite on their own words later on. And then there is another woman who is also so sure she would not ever have kids. Simply because they are annoying. Really? Is that really a good enough reason? I wonder if it is something that needs reasoning anymore. Why would someone try to justify to bunch of nobodies like us, unless she is really only trying to justify her own self. It is hard enough to decide on having a child at all, let alone having one or two. I say, it is all in god's will. Why fret?

Beh Tahan

There are just some thing that really get on my nerves......
-Older people who think that they are wiser than u just because.
-People who are dismissive. Shuts u off before you can lay your case.
-People who don't listen. And ends up making you repeat and repeat. Or it could be that they didn't really care in the first place.
-Honestly, lately I am sick of people who are vulgar. Using the f word excessively. Or cracking sexist jokes and using vulgarities then expecting you to laugh.
-Pretentious people who tries to be a Brit/American/Australian ..talks relentlessly about it, speak with a fake accent and idolize them. It doesn't matter how long you have been there. You are a Malaysian through and through.
-Opportunists. Pounce on you before you know it.
-Materialistic people. Although we all would have some wants and that's truly ok. It's another thing to fb and show it off or making it a STANDARD. So I like fugly slippers because they are comfortable. And use functional handbags and not those branded ones.speaking of that, people seems to have lack of respect for other people's choices, and judge too quickly. So what if I like kopitiam kopi O compared to Starbucks? People give themselves such a a hard time sometimes trying to appear to be uppity and missing out all the good things.
-Forcing tradition on others. I think really this is a matter of choice. Same goes with religion. But I'll respects yours even if u do not respect mine. What I hate most are people who only preach but their action speaks otherwise. I wish I could tell these people sometimes. Before u do charity elsewhere, why not channel it to your family first. Why is that so hard to comprehend? Does being recognized as generous by the public or strangers more important than your own family's recognition?
-People baffles me at times. At times I try to say nice things or just appear to be polite so as not to offend others, but people treat this as a c'mon to be rude to me. Would it be better if I just shut up altogether.

However in all honesty, I still try my best to talk some sense or just say my peace. Sometimes I just wanna get it off my chest because life really is just too short to brush it off and keep quiet about it. People can choose to be ignorant but you shouldn't. At least I can say I tried.

Retreat

As I grow older, I realize why my good friend HG left KL, then to Singapore and finally settling in Ipoh for the rest of his life. He used to tell me he's sick of it all, the traffic jam in KL, the superficiality of Singapore and that he could not fit in with those people at all, being an introvert also does not help. I thought he was just being too darn difficult.

But it does get you thinking...life's less complicated for him now, and he's not stuck in a traffic jam, people in Ipoh are also generally nicer and maybe just less competitive compared to his colleagues in Singapore.

I'm surrounded with kiasu colleagues here, and office politics just get more and more nonsensical as I changed to a bigger MNC, perhaps because as I get older, I'm more aware of it all and know when or whom to stay away from. Everyday I gotta wake up early and try my best and come home early to beat the traffic jam and to cook a decent meal (also because we'll be stuck in traffic if we went out for dinner). And then, I have to work nights doing conference calls then retire for bed at 12 or 1am. Yes it does get you thinking, how can things get better. Andrew was just commenting yesterday that we've both been working nights and really it doesn't leave us much time to do anything else (i mean hobbies etc,), usually an hour before sleep we try to watch a movie in front of the idiot box.

Not that I would jump on the wagon and move to some remote place, but I think we all can be open about how to improve the quality of our lives.

An Unexpected Offer

An ex-client of mine called me up today and gave me a job offer. I worked briefly for her about 6 months about a year ago. It was one of those horrible projects that was doomed and no one wanted to do it. We didn't talk much and really it was very much a lot of project deliverables that was heavily scrutinized. I never really thought that I was really good at what I was doing because it was my first hand at recruitment. I was not really confident but gave a shot at it and learning as I carried on. The environment was very hostile because I was an on-site supplier. I got an incredible affirmation today when she unexpectedly told me that everytime she though of recruiting she always thought of me! Wow, and she's a corporate figure and held the role of HR director when I knew her. Sometimes we just need these little affirmation to keep us going. Thank you AC.

Miri Miri

It was a week in Miri for a training on negotiations and it was great learnings. You never know how much you really sucked until you attend this training, and practise with your peers, so at the same time you get to compare yourself with your peers. Asians tend to use less key words and speak less, and if they speak a lot, it's usually beating around the bush trying to make a point :) . I did however get to meet some Brunei-ans, and I think most people (even themselves think so!) agree that they are somewhat more aggressive and authoritative (or it could be just too superior-complexed).

Miri itself was a wonderful find. At first I thought I could never live there. Then I kind of liked the tranquility and simplicity of the place. People were generally nicer (or maybe I"m just lucky). My colleague in Miri was full of pride of Miri, showing us this and that as we took a stroll. I think you could ronda the whole town in 1 hour. Another colleague was eager to take us to the Tamu and the Heritage center, and excitedly showed us how to eat the buah salak.

Miri-Brunei relationship is somewhat like Johor-Singapore. It's amusing when they tell us stories about Brunei coming to Miri for grocery and Miri going to Brunei for the cinema!

Should consider cuti-cuti Malaysia and see more of Malaysia really. I just can't get enough of it.

bersih 2.0

another landmark event on the 9th july 2011. let's hope we materialize this effort during the upcoming election.

Attention Seekers

I had an interesting conversation with someone who said that growing up she knew that she never belonged in the popular group. I think so was I. I didn't really know why and didn't care really why some girls in my class always wants to be either the smartest, the prettiest, the most athletic, and the most popular. I'm sure most of them had wanted to be the best in what they do. But that girl who always wants to be the MOST POPULAR are usually an attention seeker.

That has never changed even at work. Someone is always wanting to be the MOST POPULAR. You have to understand that I've seen these kind of people year in year out all my life so yeah, I can easily spot one! They will do anything to get attention. Well, really if you ask me, I dont really give a damn. What I find really sorely disappointing is that these attention seekers usually are very self centered.

You know, those who are really saying something to you but not really conversing with you, because their eyes shift elsewhere, or their saying something that usually CENTERS around them. Example: if I say, hey I just bought a new car. Mr Popularity may just say, "what car did you get? Ohyea, and you know I've driven so many cars, porsches, beemers, merc blablabla. Like just last week i went on a trip to see F1...complimentary tickets...blablablabla...." And all the time, Mr Popularity is not really looking at you, but it looks like he is rather making a statement and ANNOUNCING it to anyone he thinks could hear. You get the drift.

So in short, Attention Seekers are usually not attentative to what you tell them. Test them. Ask them if they remember something you told them about. I have the same people asking me about whether I'm married or whether I have kids (I dont have one). It'll be like " hey, who's taking care of your child while you're away?", "when did you get married again?" " how old is your child again?" Now that just really pisses me off. I mean, I dont really demand for someone to be tentative to trivial stuff like how many moles I have (in case I may hv flippantly mentioned that), or when is my menstrual cycle, or how many annual leave I have...blablabla. But I would at least someone to remember if I was married or not! hahaha, or have a kid or not!

SO that's why, I've always stayed away from attention seekers. We have nothing in common and really the conversations are usually dry (cause always talking about them mah). I must say there are some people who are popular, or who may be attention seekers, but they are still able to give you that equal attention you deserve. But very rare lah. You know, 80/20 rule. Have you met one?

Club Med

I just got back from a dept trip to Club Med. The rooms condition were bad but I guess that's because we didnt get the newly refurbished ones. On a more positive note, I had a lot of fun playing games and games and games. :) Drinks were free flow but I did not drink much. RM1K seems pretty OK if you consider the food, liquor, activities, the sun, fun and yoga by the beach etc etc etc, for 3 days 2 nights. It was actually not too bad. Lots of bonding and having fun. I especially liked badminton and yoga by the beach ...it felt blissful to be away from everything. I didnt have to think about bills, housework, work, etc etc. The moment I came home, all the stress comes flooding in. :( All in all, it was good times and am glad I went despite all the uncertainties ( we had an awful program that had a lot of indoor games- that was scrapped last minute :) )