Diam Diam Ubi Berisi

There's this colleague of mine who never fails to surprise me. And she's a character that interests me since she's quiet but always ever charming if she wants to. I've slowly discovered new things about her and joked that she was a suppressed extrovert and became an introvert involuntarily! Well yesterday, after maybe 4 months long on a team event, she finally made known that she was not happy about being excluded in some discussion although she was part of a selected group in the team to come up with the activities. Well, one thing I must say, as she didn't voice out, so no one really knew. But at the same time, since our company is all about Diversity and Inclusiveness, then someone should have made an effort to include her in. People shouldn't conveniently forget and exclude someone just because she is quiet! I've always been the type that tries to include everyone, especially if you're in the leadership team, you tend to seek opinion from everyone because those who are quiet, sometimes they are withholding some very good ideas because they are shy, so at times just needs to be coaxed or feel that they are part of the team. I find this lacking in the younger generation. The fine personal touch and the sensitivity that you need to make a team work.

Things just seems easier in the past, when leaders were real leaders. When things were simplified and everyone has a common goal : GET THE WORK DONE.

Sad News

My parents said that Rota, my sister's Cambodian maid, has not called home since Jan. And although normally the maids are not allowed to call home for fear that they may get distracted, my mom bought her a calling card anyways. Rota is a mother of 2. I cannot imagine how it must feel to leave your children for 2 years. I finally managed to get through to her husband, after figuring out the country code etc. When she was done, she announced to all of us that her sister passed away and then she broke down and started crying. I gave her a box of tissues and we left her be so she can mourn. 10minutes later, she was back at work, sweeping and washing the dishes. Whilst some of us spoilt ones here, we rant about almost anything, and cry at the slightest, makes us all just seem a little dramatic now. I asked if she was Ok, and she told me and my mom that her niece passed away too! The niece was bit by a stray dog and never healed, so she passed away 3 months later! She told me that she has instructed her husband to fetch her children from her mom's place because there are a lot of dogs there too.

There's a lot of determination and strength in this woman. Never demanding and ever smiling. She continued her work and steers forward.

Customer Service

I have been for the past 2 weeks waiting for someone in my company to deliver my monitor that is already in the store. 2 weeks! Tell me how is that more efficient that the ah kow in a chinafied grocery store that can deliver 1 tong of gas in 1 hour? I dont get it. In the name of the cyberworld and where everything is computerized, I have more emails flying here and there trying to figure out who to deliver the actual goods to me. In the midst of all the chaos, the IT helpdesk has the cheek to INFORM me that they are closing my ticket because in THEIR dept, in terms of getting the other party to acknowledge that an order is already in place, it's a done deal and they can close it. I was like 'HULLO, I still don't have the monitor........" As far as I'm concerned it's all CYBERTALK! talk cock indeed. Wtf. we're better off with the ahbeng in Lowyat.

Pah's Getting Married!

Finally, Pah's getting married this weekend! Although Tih's not here but Tih's been getting updates from me, so you can imagine how excited we are over this. Yeah me, Tih and Pah go way way back.

Our friendship hit the high note (dont know how to describe it !) when we met up again in university. She was one of those who you can really connect on so many levels because we really 'grew up' together. I've seen her through breakups, graduation, working life, new life, being Mrs. Khor really, made me happy even seeing her trying on her evening gown. Weird right, but I guess that's what friendship does to you. :) She also saw me through some of the happiest and worst time of my life.

She's going through the same jitters and worry right now in preparation for her big day tomorrow. Although I do think she's way more calm and less kelam kabut. If you're reading this Kye, think of the bigger picture, there's more to life after the whole ordeal! It will make the nitty gritty details seems insignificant. Embrace the new life as Mr and Mrs Khor! Congrats!

Friendship at Work

I was just reading an article the other day about sustainability at work and how important friends/peers are at work. I could not agree more. It's also our natural instinct to find our niche group when we are at work. People you can connect with and most importantly, people that you trust. And when I say trust, there are many levels of trust that is REQUIRED at work.

I looked back on my previous employments and realize that the friendships I built over the years were great, although not all of them lasted, and some of them went bust immediately as soon as I left the company. I guess it's inevitable. Think about it. As the article points out, the most common topic is about the boss! Or the management.

Nevertheless, it's hard to be a lone ranger at work. I never want to be that lone ranger just because I'm the type who looks forward for lunch and would at my utmost gather people to lunch with me. Dont get me wrong, I can eat alone as I used to eat alone not by choice. But why be the hermit if you can lunch with others. It's sometimes a MUCH NEEDED break from the hustle and bustle in front of the idiot screen (the pc monitor is the idiot screen for me). I need people time after too much of virtual 'interaction' on the internet.

Of course there are some who prefer to be hermits, and if so, let them be and dont try to bug them because everyone has to respect that. Some people just prefer to be private and because some of us spend almost 10-12 hours at work, so maybe they just need their space. Unfortunately there are some bosses who force you into situations where you have to interact involuntarily, I mean why? I understand the need to be visible at work, but what works for you may not necessarily work for another.

Has anyone build a friendship with their boss?? There is always an unsaid barrier. I don't know sometimes if it warrants to be called a friendship. I know there is always mutual respect (well, not all of them!) and sometimes some paranoia from either party! I know none of my bosses have made it on my facebook, that's for sure! But then again, I know some people who are not really 'friends' on facebook , but that's a whole other topic!

I do have friends at work that I hold dear too, although it saddens me that sometimes friends at work come and go, but the least I would do is to stay optimistic. Not all friendships are meant to be, and not seeing them everyday at work doesn't mean the friendship is bust.

Pet Peeves

1) People who don't pay attention

2) People who do not queue

3) People who interrupts you when you're speaking

4) Chinese people who speak Cantonese/Mandarin even though there are people of different races in the group.

5) Judgemental people - who judge too quickly. What you see is not necessarily as what you think.

6) Dirty toilets and wet toilet seats (cmon)

7) Poor customer service- whether banking, restaurants or mobile service provider etc. but I think i've learnt to come into terms with that. :)

8) People who are self centered. Usually these people also falls under #1 and #3 because chances are they dont pay attention to what you're saying hence would keep interrupting you when you're trying to convey something.

9) HYPOCRITES. HYPOCRITES. HYPOCRITES.

10) Verbal Abuse. Form of abuse without inflicting physical pain but can cause long term psychological damage.