Monday, September 24, 2007

The Right Click

I've concluded that my friends fall into these following categories...
1) humble people- I have to say i just love humble people. People who are not snobbish or put on airs because they are rich or hold great careers.
2) People who talk- And i mean really talk. Not ignore strangers in the group or only talk to their own clique. I think women tend to do that. It's always girl friends of my gal/guy friends who tend to ignore or whisper good-for-nothings amongst themselves. I wonder if they know what RUDE is.
3) NON-UPTIGHT people- means they are just looking for a good time. Or a chillout time. Or basically people looking to relax.
4) Friends who are there for each other- so far, I think my friends have always been there for me when i need them. I dont look for a shoulder to cry on, but usually friends to help me go through bad phases in many ways-coffee sessions, yumcha sessions, eating and eating.

Life As It Is

I got a very intriguing advice from endroog's dad that is stuck in my mind. He says the secret in youth and happiness is not through the facial cream you buy or those anti-aging treatment we indulge in. The secret lies in how you approach life. Don't take life so seriously.

In this I don't mean that you ought to quit your job and rot at home. Or not do anything productive in life. In this i mean to be not so petty over small things or fret and worry over things you can't control.

You tend to see the world a whole lot better. You feel better even.
If you are one of those who spends maybe 80-100% of your life at work, it's time to take a step back. If you can't finish the work, do it tomorrow. Working hours weren't meant to extended indefinitely. It doesn't make you a GREAT or a HARDWORKING person just because you work late.

If you are one of those who gets angry at home all the time because the house is in a mess, or that you can't pay your bills, or someone at home annoys you, or just things simply get in your way, well, let it go. Just don't fret over it. Just work on those one by one lightheartedly.

Money is never enough. That's something we've all gotta accept. And we will never make enough to be satisfied because human nature is just that they are insatiable! So to your utmost affordable level, travel and have fun. If you are those who are misers because you think you wanna save ur money for a rainy day, well, life's too short for that.


Your Money is Mine and My Money is Mine

I got some financial advise from some colleagues today and to my dismay there are even today working women who hands in their hard-earned money to their husbands. Why, well, here's what I've gathered......

1) Because the wives think it's much better to have a pool money (husband's income + wife's income) and let the husbands do the manipulation, the investment, the expenditure and the billing, insurance, car loans, house loans etc and all that headache.
2) Because the wives are big spenders. The more money they have, the more likely everything goes into shopping -but, isn't that woman's prerogative anyways?
3) Because to facilitate income tax declaration, easier for the husband to keep track of the accounting bit of the marriage.

Well, all this work IF you trust your husband that well. It's not about fidelity or a question of a married couple should be MORE TRUSTING of each other, but it is a question of WHAT IF.... What if the husband decides to leave the wife and the wife is left in a rut, penniless? What if the husbands suddenly decides to spend it all at the casino for what he thought would be the biggest win in his life? What if the husband decide that he's gonna get another younger trophy wife?

Is it wrong to be just extra cautious? Is it so difficult to just manage ur own finance SEPARATELY? Seriously, all that loans, insurance, credit cards and car loans etc are EASY nowadays with internet banking. At least you're in control of your financial status.

Somehow i dont see myself transferring my wages (even via e-banking) to my future husband, and then taking cash/handouts from him when i want to. Even if the husband is fair and equal and let's me charge it on the credit card for all that i purchase, IT"S JUST NOT THE SAME.

And only one occasion that i've heard of one of my guyfriends who gives HIS WAGES to his wife because he doesn't trust himself. ONLY ONCE.

A Confrontation

Initially i thought my mom and aunt from Singapore were back here to bid farewell to my sis and also for an eating trip, but then, i found out they had another agenda. A confrontation regarding the house in Teluk Anson.

And so, my uncle wrote the chronological event of the house. Right from who were the first owners( my grandma), and then the distribution of rent, and the fact that the geran tanah was now under my dad's name because he took out a RM40K govt loan for renovations, etc. The house initially belonged to my mom's side, and not my dad!

But the confrontation is not with my dad. My dad couldnt care less about the house. It was with my first uncle's (who passed away) wife. The wife wants to sell off the house but the money to be shared out within the Tan family ONLY TO THOSE WITH THE SURNAME TAN. Which includes her kids and grandchildren EXCLUDING me and my sisters and the children of my aunt.

I think the aunt missed out the fact that the house is in my dad's name afterall. hehehe. If my dad was half as evil as she is, he probably would have sold off the house quitely and passed on the money to my little niece. But then my dad's too much of a gentleman. hehe.

And so, my mom and aunt and uncle headed off to her house in Taman Desa for a confrontation. A rather 'friendly' wan. The other party was saying she doesn't want my mom to fret over the house. bla bla bla. My mom (ever the no-nonsense garang woman) only told her that the house can be sold, but then the money to be distributed to only the remaining siblings of my first uncle.

Mission accomplished and quite satisfied they left and shared the news with the rest of us. We asked my dad how much is the house worth anyway.....barely RM100K, it's freaking Teluk Anson anyways!

Saturday, September 22, 2007


Anyone who knows me well would probably know that i don't like to shop, and well, i didn't have a reason to last time. Now however, perhaps like a bad karma, i have to shop for my new job soon.

I dunno about you, i hate having sales people to tailgate me while i browse through the clothes and repeatedly asking me if i like this or not, or if i want this or not. If i think it suits me, i'll try it on and MAYBE buy. IF i do have any questions, i'll ask.

And then there are those really shitty salespeople who once really cissed me off. Me and my sisters were on a spree to look for a wedding gown for her and we went to one in Sri Hartamas. When we came in, she immediately asked who was the bride, and looking at my sis who's a plus size, she quickly took 5 dresses and said THOSE were the only ones for her. And they all look drabby. IMagine if u were the bride-to-be!

And well, let's face it, none of us are supermodel-like, and finding the right clothes can be a challenge sometimes. My tubby-like body and 'shortness' makes it difficult for me to find cheap, nice stuff off the shelves.

So finally, it was crunch time and i knew i had to get something. So i bought regular stuff at the assumed places, Topshop, MNG, Dorothy Perkins. But truly, the best finds were at the boutiques in Bangsar. They never seems to fail me. Who cares if they are brandless coz they are freaking cheap! As long as it FITS. Namely, PurpleDotz, Baci, etc, there are too many to remember. Caters for women of all shapes. None for men unfortunately. Strictly for females only.

And so, i have a renewed taste for shopping now. Especially when i can pick and go now. :)

Monday, September 17, 2007


The HR of my new company request that i do the medical checkup before i join the company in Oct 1st. I didn't think much of it as i thought it was a norm. My uncle exclaimed in horror how come i have already got the offer letter before the medical checkup, while my sis says that normally the medical checkup is done during the 1st week of work.

So, now i'm confused...which is the correct protocol?

Anyway, off i went and the letter detailed the test i have to take- Urine Test, Hepatitis B screening, Blood Count, Chest X-Ray, Medical Examination, Pregnancy Test..... "Pregnancy Test???" my uncle went WTF. I said that the HR even asked me specifically during my interview whether I have plans to get married in these coming 2 years. Or if was planning a baby etc.

My uncle explained that to even imply that women is being discriminated due to their pregnant-ability, is a basic violation of human rights that could cause an uproar. I suppose we could refuse to answer, or lightly remind the interviewer that these are pregnant-ability does not make one unfit to work.

Sex discrimination happens in every form that sometimes we do not see because we take it as a norm. Like the notion that women are ONLY SUITABLE for office work. Or that women most likely end up in the ACCOUNTS/ADMIN/HR dept. Or that women can't be good leaders. Or that women do not have to have a career for they are destined to make babies and be a homemaker at the end of the day. It's worse when women themselves feel that way too- no questions asked!

I respect women who are career-goers and homemakers. Both are tough acts to follow and neither one is easier than the other. If we women ourselves don't respect that, how can you expect men to do so.

Have u encountered any before?

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Carpe Diem!

You know the saying Seize The Day. I think since Dead Poets' Society (Robin Williams, Ethan Hawke, etc), the quote was left embedded in my mind. And so, a lot of people seize the day differently.

To some, to seize the day is to use every ounce of your energy to build on a great career and strive hard to be a somebody. Never to lose a moment or waste any time at all.

To some, to seize the day is on the contrary, to not waste ALL your time on your work, but to allocate time to do what you most desire.

To some, to seize the day is to grab every opportunity that comes across you. It sometimes takes the sensibility out of you, but who cares? Some opportunities you've yet to determine if it's good or bad, but TAKE IT ANYWAY and take the chances and see what happens.

Well, for most of us, maybe our day to day life is getting by a 9 to 5 job, then rush home to make/have dinner, rush to meet friends or get home to rest. Seize the day?? What's left of the rest of the day anyways once you've done all that? Maybe 2-3 hours, in which you find yourself more often than not infront of the IDIOT BOX! HAHAHA.

So, maybe in a week, take 2-3 days to really SEIZE THE DAY. Go out and do something out of ordinary, call up and old friend or go on a short road trip. I mean, do you even remember the last craziest thing you did???? I mean a really crazy one??? Perhaps for me was the one night with the gays in Bangkok. OK, do share!

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

My Workplace-A Kindergarden

I've always likened my workplace to a kindergarden. A place where a bunch of kids are running around and messing around. If the headmaster and the teachers are strict, then the bunch of kids are disciplined and do great in school. Otherwise, the bunch of kids continue to run around and mess everything up.

Just then, I was explaining to a colleague about a really straightforward report and how he's supposed to JUST FILL IN THE BLANKS accordingly to furnish a database. It got me really geram because i have to explain to him EVERY MONTH the same shit over and over again. I had to take the kindergarden approach and explain to him like he's one of those kids running around.

And you know how kids are sometimes really nosy? They like to gossip and nose around other kid's business? Well, that's what people here at work do. They like to nose around in my dept's stuff and neglect their own work. Why, u ask....because they wanna find fault in my dept so that if anything happens they got the bullets to fire at us. Stupid right? Afterall, we just makan gaji only wat. Why get so hung up laaaaa.

Hopefully my new workplace would suit me better. A less-geram one.

Monday, September 10, 2007


I did a post last year when a colleague of mine left Farewells . I don't believe in it. I think farewells are like full-stops and it seems to cut off all ties. Unless you plan not to see that person ever again. Or you may NEVER see that person again. A simple 'KEEP IN TOUCH" ought to do. NO?

But if you do plan not ot see that person ever again, then why even have a pretentious little party to say your goodbyes to him/her? Out of courtesy? Because it's a tradition?

I'm sending my farewell memos to counterparts overseas now because I really do think that we probably won't meet again. And also out of courtesy to inform them of my resignation. But also to note to them to NOT TO REQUEST ANY REPORTS FROM ME ANYMORE. Yoohoo. Sort of a nicer way to say GO-BOTHER-SOMEONE-ELSE-NOW. And well, also to say my thanks to people at work who matters.

But to close friends at work- I'm lucky to have made some great friends here. 4 years do mean a lot to me, especially my 'older colleagues' who've all been great mentors to me in life. People who were always there to share/nag/advise/gossip. So DO I HAVE TO SAY GOODBYE?

I refused a farewell dinner/lunch. They insist that they have to- IT"S A TRADITION. I'm like "aiyoh, now modern age la. Just email/sms/call/instant message IM etc whenever la." unfortunately some of my older colleagues don't know what IM is. argh......Even if they do, they probably type really slow.

If we really do gotta say farewells, I think I'll say farewell to the work, the big taukes (so as to notify them you're leaving the farking place). And to customers and suppliers - ALSO to say GO-BOTHER-SOMEONE-ELSE-NOW.
And that'll do i think. What do you think.

Where's My Uniform?

My 1st sis asked me today if i've got proper clothes already for my new job. That's because for the past 4 years I've been wearing uniform to work! Bless me, free lagi! My family and sis' bf (Jason) says it makes me look like a, and drabby. I match it with my sports shoes lagi. hehe.

And in truth i don't really dress very well. No fashion or dress sense. I just dress comfortably and so it appears weird sometimes. Ah Sou sometimes, Selekeh sometimes...

So now i have to don a proper handbag , i recently bought a MNG one that endroo thinks it's a carry-able bag to be seen in KL. Bah! Probably needs to get some proper jackets and shirts, pants and skirts. I guess no choice but to join the crowd.

But then, I guess stingy me would probably get some hand-me-downs from 1st sis for now. :) Thank gawd for sisters-with-almost-same-size.

The Soya Shop

Everyday i scratch my head trying to improvise endroog's liquid diet. And we found this! The Soya Shop in Ikano Power Center. Taufoofah for only RM2 which MUST be soft or else it wouldn't have seeped through endroog's teeth with his jaws shut tight! Just found out that it's also in Sri Hartamas Shopping Center and 1 Utama, Endah Parade and Low Yat.

And btw, anyone has any good ideas for a great menu for people on liquid diet? So far, taufoofah and telur setengah masak is as good as it gets.

Nag Nag Nag

I've turned into a nag! Seriously, the past few weeks I'm taking care of endroog made me realize the awful truth that i've become a NAG! The whole awakening made me more aware that I do nag a lot.

Even at work. I sometimes nag at my staff, trying to drill into their head some points i wanna make and reasons why they should do things in a certain way. Worse now that i'm leaving, i tend to nag more at them, so that they will remember.

I even nag on my blog! Sometimes i make too much emphasis on a particular topic and it becomes a 'nag material'!

Maybe it's to do with aging. Some people say that people like to nag out of frustration that people can't see eye to eye with them. Some people nag because they like listening to their own voice. Haha. Some people nag because they feel that they GOTTA put the message across. and to MAKE SURE it gets across.

Is naggy same as long-winded???? Is naggy same as being repetitive?? You talk about the same thing over and over again but maybe in a different manner everytime???

Friday, September 07, 2007

When You Resign....

1) Whenever someone asks u where you're going, just say it's somewhere better with better salary. And leave it as that.
2) Try not to leave any 'shit' for people to 'sweep' after u go.
3) Don't expect a grand farewell. I hope i can just leave in silence to save all the big hoo-hah.
4) If someone's been pissing or bullying u at work, now's your chance to say your mind.
5) Take all that's necessary. Including the perks that comes with the work. Make full use of the benefits you are entitled to.
6) Relax. Chances are, in one month's time before ur last day, you probably won't be required to do much work. More in the matter of completing your unfinished work.
7) Get a nice gift for your boss. If he was good to you, that is. If not, fark it.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

Check Your Law

Happily, i applied for leave to clear them since i'm gonna be leaving this company. After my boss requested that i reduced the no. of leave, my HR then told me something really strange.

He can't release my last salary unless i've had clearance from the IRB. WTF? I asked him why? He said that in case i owe IRB for income tax, that the company is liable if that should happen.

Income tax is between me and the govt wat. What's it gotta do with the company. He was very determined that he was right. I didn't say anything even though i thought it was really ridiculous. That i will get my last salary by cheque and it could be longer as they need to get clearance.

i then called my twin sis. She, like me, resigned as well, and her HR did not advise so, and that she'll receive her EA form as usual NEXT YEAR. Then i called my other sis, who's a lawyer, and told me the same thing.

I told my HR then. Of course, statements from 2 sisters won't be enough for a conviction. So i insist that he shows me the Income Tax Act under the Employer-Employee in Private Sectors. I said that who knows maybe you guys have been doing it all wrong all this while! Scary aye. Finally I FOUND IT. after maybe an hour. It says that in the case when someone resigns, the new employer has to notify IRB. You only need to declare or clear your income tax only if you are on retirement, or that you were leaving the country for more than 3 months.

He was semi-convinced now. Made a call to his own reliable source and confirmed it.

Lastly i asked him, "so, you're gonna bank in my salary as usual right?" He grinned in embarrassment and said OK.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

Drift Away

Day after day I'm more confused
Yet I look for the light
Through the pourin' rain
You know that's a game that I hate to lose
And I'm feeling the strain
Ain't it a shame - Rolling Stones
Say what you want but their songs still rock like no others can. Anyone likes As Tears Go By and Paint It Black? If you've seen that series "NAM: Tour of Duty", you'd know Paint It Black.

The Road TO Merdeka

Does anyone know the road to Merdeka that Malaysia had to endure? I wonder if every Malaysian knew what it took to get to where we are. 50 years is a big deal. Even if we are still to many quite 'kampung' or backward, well, at least we have the freedom to be so. At least back then, people cared about the country. Called it patriotism, well, it was significant then. Maybe now, what we Malaysians often like to do is just sit and complain.

Sure the CPM is what people call terrorists these days. But at least they did something to help the country to reach independence. If not for CPM, would we have had a shot at MERDEKA?

And yeah, sure we can always argue about how bad this PM was and how good that PM was, but in fact, if not for them, we wouldn't have the freedom of speech that we enjoy now.

At least we didn't had to go through what Cambodians had to during the Pol Pot regime. Or what Vietnam had to go through.
Anyone know of a good documentary of our struggle to independence?
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