King Of Wishful Thinking

I refuse to give in to my blues

That's not how it's going to be

And I deny the tears in my eyesI

don't want to let you see.. no

That you have made a hole in my heart

And now I've got to fool myself..I'll get over you..

I know I will

I'll pretend my ship's not sinking

And I'll tell myself I'm over you

'cause I'm the king of wishful thinking..I'll get over you..

I know I will I'll pretend my ship's not sinking

And I'll tell myself I'm over you

'cause I'm the king of wishful thinking- GO WEST

Wishful thinking or just fooling ourselves... Hey, we all need to fool ourselves sometimes to get past things, especially painful things. That is why i can understand why some people they need to do certain things that may be out of this world, or say the things that they do. We all need to find ways and avenues to get by. Sometimes time doesn't really heal wounds, sometimes we just need to do some wishful thinking.

At the Brink of Depression?

Got these people around me whom i've noticed to carry these symptons...

1) talking nonsensical things that is either very unimportant or that doesnt make sense..

2) he or she talks to u without expecting an answer from you

3) relates everything to his/her religion

4) very moody, could be nice and friendly with u one day and aloof the next day

5) very lonely and expects you to always be by his/her side

6) laughs loudly to themselves

7) has no desire to do anything or with anyone

8) no desire to meet anyone

9) basically no desire at all

Of Possessions and Such

My life can be pretty much summed up by the boxes of knick knacks and whatnots stacked and shoved is spaces beneath beds in Ipoh and KL. I have this ritual of opening and repacking the boxes every now and then, browsing through my possessions again and again.

Funny but my prized possessions are actually not worth anything at all....

My possessions date way back when i was in primary school, so u can just imagine, from fluorescent ugly shoelaces (used to be a fad!), button badges of NKOTB, even Duran Duran, old cassette tapes of 80s music to small gifts from friends.

You know those little notebooks u have when u were in school and u used them to write stuff and pass around to friends during classes , passing little notes when the teacher is not looking? well i kept all those, it has funny pictures for example a great sketch of my ex-dog, Snowy by weiyi and silly poems that we wrote during Science classes....and Sookching asking me where to go after school, like 'want to eat pizza bread in Ipoh Parade after class?'

and all those unfinished artwork during art class most of the time we were chatting more than doing the actual work. i kept all those, god knows why...

just last week i was at my Ipoh house and was looking through my mom's pics from her heydays, in short miniskirts and big sunglasses and Jackie O outfits...hahaha, i wasn't the only one who keeps my memories in boxes and such.

just found out that sweeks was a fan of the volkswagen beetle and thought i'd ask my 2nd sis if she wanted to sell her junk, that's been sitting in tmn desa and recently 'moved out' to subang. thought she didn't want it anymore, but no, even in the pathetic state the car is in, she didnt want to sell it. First cars are hard to forget but i doubt people keep them anymore.

Gift

It's that time of the year again when everyone's rushing off to get gifts for valentine's day and whatnots...what did you get your other half? in truth, i haven't been buying guys' stuff in a while and i finally got something that

1) i would like to see him wearing it..

2) something both of us can enjoy...

3) something to remind him of me....

but then the art of giving is unique isn't it? every gift tells a story and after years of keeping 'em in boxes, u can't help but feel a bit fluffy inside when u see those gifts again. And every gift small or big gives u a different feel..

recently i got a watch from Andrew...it's not anything fancy..but then he remembered that i can't wear watches coz it gives me a rash...so he found a leather strapped watch and a real simple one for me to wear for ANY occasion because he knows how chinchai i am ....see the thought he put into buying this simple yet great gift? been wearing it everyday and i haven't got a rash !

everyone says giving is better than receiving..but who doesnt love gifts?

i just found out a friend of mine actually sets the budget for gifts and discusses with the gf so that they both agree on it. how clever and necessary sometimes especially for couples who are planning a wedding or ultimately a life together, when u need to sometimes save money for other necessities....

The Kite Runner

A tale of Afghanistan, Taliban, America, brotherhood and love. Mostly the book made me think a lot about karma. And how things good or bad always goes round and hits you in the head. It made me think of values and the Islamic views, and what Afghans witnessed during the unrest in the 80s, from Russians to the Talibans...Watch the movie if you're lazy. An interesting line in the book made me think about tortured souls, about things we did or did not do that is so wrongful and sinful that you may just live to regret it for the rest of your life.

Happy Chinese New Year

Happy Chinese New Year folks... The new year began with some mixed feelings: glad that i'm back for a short while, bad that there's some company restructuring on travel allowance, glad again that i'm in singapore but bad again that there's been some bad news among the family members. Well, we all need to take things in  a stride, I guess. Things happen for a reason, and it is to me, just another phase we all need to walk through. I guess, THAT"S LIFE. Have a great one, guys!

Across The Universe

From the director who gave us The Lion King, this is a movie made from the many wonderful songs by the Beatles. Across The Universe is filled with cinematic scenes and with the familiar sounds of the very loved songs from the Beatles. If you love the Beatles like me and Andrew do, this is THE movie to watch! THe problem is, where to find the dvd? I might just go look it up in Singapore tomorrow.....

When will we learn?

People are so quick to assume that because I look Chinese, I am from China.

People are so quick to assume that because I look Chinese, I can speak Mandarin.

People are so quick to assume that because I am Asian, I can't speak English.

People are so quick to assume that because I am Asian, I can't write well in English.

So many assumptions. So little respect. aii..

I find it extremely presumptious and a little offended, even when people say, "Oh, you speak very good English". I got that comment after arguing with the accomodation officer.

Maaf, a lecturer here was quite nasty. I felt that his question was not clear enough. The question was as follows:- What happens with the marginal abatement cost (or permit price) if some polluters do not comply. Explain your answer. I felt that I should ask what he meant with comply, comply with what? And so I asked if he meant that those polluters who didn't comply were polluters who did not participate in the market. He told me that I can check in the dictionary for the meaning of comply.

People need to see the world more.