Job Sniffing

Well, I'll be damned...just when I was announcing that I'm gonna fark from this current job, I'm getting interviews flooding in. This is what I did. Forget Jobstreet. Forget Jobsdb. They're as slow as hell. In 30 minutes, I sent 20 applications out. I searched for the addresses of the companies related to my field, and tada! sent to the email addresses available. Just google : 10 Best _____ Company in Malaysia and you're on a roll! Try it. Lose that job that you've always hated!

S.M.A.R.T. ?

Should have given you all the heads up on this, but I myself had nearly missed this documentary on the SMART (Stormwater Management and Road Tunnel) project, which was shown yesterday (Aug 29) at 9pm, as a special feature in Discovery Channel’s Extreme Engineering show. Extreme it was indeed.

Here’s what it’s gonna look like:-

The upper dual levels are for motor-traffic and bottom-most path is the waterway. The concept, as I understand it, is that if there were massive floods, the 2-level roads will be closed for traffic and the whole 3 levels will be used to drain flood waters.

For more info, go to http://www.smarttunnel.com.my/

While I am duly impressed with the technical and construction efforts behind this gigantic project, I question the need for such an expensive project. They tell us that the almost RM2billion project will improve traffic and control flooding. Mind you, it’s purely for KL City Centre. And yes, every Malaysian citizen is paying tax to fund this massive job. Yes, I understand the importance of having to eliminate the problems that flashfloods cause, but really, can we afford this? Don’t we (in KL) only get flashfloods during the monsoon season, ie May to September? Are there really no other better alternatives? Couldn’t they just build massive drains? Couldn’t we wait till our economy was somewhat stronger before ‘draining’ our resources on this? Shouldn’t our tax money be used to serve a bigger audience, and not just the KL-ites? By the way, we have to pay 40 years worth of toll fare for this. No cause to be critical? What are your thoughts on this?

Taichi Culture

Maybe people like me are suckers. But when it comes to doing the minute complicated shitload of the work, the big bosses always taichi it down to me. Shove it to me when they know I can't refuse. In the meetings, it's always, oh..no problem, but right out of the meeting, they shove it to me and I'm expected to complete it because it was already agreed in the meeting. Fark. I'm such a sucker. And the older generation of managers, pretending that they know shit and keyboard pounding-handicapped, taichi it to me like the younger tech-savvy generation-xers can do any damn work they don't wanna do. Fark. I gotta taichi it to some other sucker, coz this sucker is looking for another job elsewhere!

Of Siti, K, Mawi and Ina

See Parlimentalk .Our UMNO Parlimentarians have nothing else to talk about. So what if the 'rakyat' wants to watch the Siti&DatoK wedding? It's as good as Pamela&KidRock wedding to them. So what if the 'rakyat' wanna watch Mawi&Ina split & tell all? It's as good as Pitt&Jennifer split story. Oi..talk about something else please!

Of Ah Lians and Ah Bengs

I've just seen too many of them...dated too many of them...and loathed too many of them. I thought it's only fair that I give the definition of what maketh an AhLian and an AhBeng here....

How to spot an Ah Beng..

1) An Ah Beng sports dyed hair(preferably blond or orange) , sometimes longgish...

2) An Ah Beng likes to dress in black...

3) An Ah Beng likes to swear..KNN, Diu, and etc (don't think i wanna elaborate)

4) An Ah Beng is a koo wak jai wannabe...( I blame in on Ekin Cheng, Noodle Cheng whatever) claims to be some gangster member

5) An Ah Beng is accessorized with a heavily modified car

How to spot an Ah Lian..

1) An Ah Lian has straight dyed long hair with lotsa makeup

2) An Ah Lian likes to wear fakes- fake watch, fake LV, fake Gucci, fake nails...

3) An Ah Lian likes to giggle with fellow Ah Lians and laugh like hyenas...

4) An Ah Lian is accessorized with a fellow Ah Beng to form the 'perfect' couple

Phewwwww....Are u one of them?

The Malaysian Debt Diet

Well, I was on MC last Friday, and I caught this on tv- Oprah'sDebtDiet . Has some seriously interesting tips on how we can save our money. Well, i'm going to attempt to Malaysianize it so we can use it...

1) Reduce Credit Card debt- How many of u guys out there are seriously in debt with your credit card company? Did you know that you can wave some percentage off if you would just pick up the phone and CALL them..tell them,,,this is all you have, and ask for a waiver!

2) Reduce Eating Out expenses- I've tried this myself, and compared - Eating out will cost RM5 per person , that's RM35 for 1 week, but by cooking your own meals, you'd probably only spend RM35 per week for 2 persons!

3) Eat light lunch- I realize that we Malaysians eat really heavy lunch when most of us who the sit-in-office workers don't really need that much of calories. Try eating some crackers with a hearty Milo drink once in a while.

4) Take Up Part time Jobs- Really, instead of spending your time whiling away at the mamak- talking about how to make more money, why not just take up a part time job tutoring- it could be just RM50 per week, but you'll be generating an extra RM200 per month!

5) Selling Your Old Junk- What's junk to you may be gem to others....try Ebay

Anyone has other useful tips?

Merdeka Thanksgiving...

An appropriate time to say my thanks for many Malaysia's wonderful gifts...

1) Kacang putih, cendol, ais kacang- the many different goodies from our multi-racial community.

2) Mamak- it's amazing how versatile the mamak can be- it can be a meeting place for business, social outing, watching football, watching F1, getting your daily grub...

3) Cheap DVDs - yar I know, not supposed to support piracy, but where else can I get my monthly doses of good movies if not through the DVD vendors who can get me the latest movies

4) Pasar Malam- its amazing what you can gather from a short 30-min walk through the pasar malam..it is irresistable in its own unique ways..

Erm..I guess that's all I can think of...

My Merdeka Wish

With Merdeka Day just around the corner, I thought it'll be appropriate to place my wishes. This year, my Merdeka wish would be :

1) Reduction in toll charges - hey, I'm not asking a lot, just perhaps the Kerinchi Link and the Ipoh-KL toll charges. And what about the RM1 toll for the stretch from Kerinchi Link to the TTDI toll? (seems ridiculously short to pay RM1)

2) The end of Mahathir-Badawi squabble- ok..time to move on to something more interesting.

3) Reduction in car prices- local cars are still overpriced. Satria Neo for RM 50K...hardly justified.

4) Reduction in tax- Already we are underpaid..just as soon as we hit RM2600 we have to pay tax...c'mon, someone needs to look at how the tax is justified against our expenditure and earnings per year.

5) More transparency in our government's budget expenditure- So...the budget tells us what is GOING to be spent on- but there's no review/reflection on what was ACTUALLY spent on the previous year...

6) Elimination of AhBengs and AhLians - hahaha, this is wishful thinking but wouldn't it be great if they were wiped out of Malaysia? At least I won't have to put up with Hongkie wannabes or Hukkien bengs.

What's your Merdeka 2006 wish?

National Toilet Summit

Some 'very important people' recently held a National Toilet Expo and Forum in a SHOPPING MALL, organized by the 'Quality Restroom Association'. OK, gimme a break. It is quite an embarrassment when your VIPs have to organize trivial events like this to teach their people how to use the toilet properly. What a joke. And where is this held at? At a friggin SHOPPING MALL! Why? because that's where you'll find your citizens :(

Being a Malaysian, when I see articles like this in the news, I feel disappointed and embarrassed and sad. I don't hate this country. I want to love this country but sometimes you gotta give me something to love. We at tihtahpah don't hate this country. We're just disappointed and frustrated. We're frustrated because we feel powerless. We are scared. Scared that the country's not gonna make it far. Well, I'm tellin ya, we ain't gonna make it when the gov is engrossed in teaching their people basic toilet etiquette! That's just sad. And we're not talking about a poor country where people couldn't afford to eat or go to school. We're talking about a healthy developing country with a good education system to cover the population. It's just damn disheartening to see these 'educated' people stuck in barbaric mentality. We can see what's holding us back but there's nothing we can do about it, except to vent it here, hoping to open the minds of even the tiniest fraction of the society.

It's a sad day :(

I LOVE LAT

Now...this is a truly Malaysian Original. It's even being published in UK. It's somewhat a reflection of Lat's life -The Kampung Boy..and somewhat political too. There's even one edition called It's A Lat Lat Lat World.

I miss the weekly dose of Lat in NST :( Dato' Lat...here's a tabik to u.

I HATE MALAYSIAN REALITY TV

I hate Malaysian Reality TV shows. It's lame, awkward, un-funny, un-original. Even A Simple Life is better than what Malaysia reality tv show-'maker' can offer.

1) One in A Million - the judges are laffable

2) Malaysian Idol- give me a break, what makes Daniel Lee think he can sing anyway?

3) Akademi Fantasia - fantasy my ass!

4) Malaysia's Most Beautiful - migosh...I feel like gagging...If those idiots represent Malaysia's Most Beautiful, the rest of us are no better than a swine.

5) The Scholar - Alamak...follow The Apprentice kah?

To Malaysia Reality TV Show-Makers...pls leave the 'creative' work to the professionals. And...we were doing so well with originals like Pimai Pimai Tang Tu, Kopitiam...etc (I clearly dont watch RTM/TV3 at all). So..be original, will ya?

NOW everyone can fly!

I love all these airlines competing to give cheaper airfare...When you really think about it, flying used to be a luxury unknown to the medium-wage earners like me, often resorting to long hours crammed in the bus or bumpy rides in my lil' rundown Kelisa. NOW, we don't have to take MAS. Life's about CHOICES. We have no-frills AirAsia- really I can do without the pathetic range of red wine in MAS flights and the orange juice, and now..we have TigerAirways. So, Malaysia govt shifted the AirAsia Terminal to the LCCT-in an effort to bring down Air Asia....(btw Air Asia counterattack with a really lowfare transfer from KL Sentral to LCCT for only RM9). The govt can do anything they want. Worse come to worse, we'll just take the FirstCoach bus from Bangsar to Novena(Singapore) and take Tiger Airways to whatever International destination!Now everyone can truly fly...hehe

Of Soap Operas and Malaysian TV

OK...I was watching 24 Season 4 and the Secretary of State was played by William Devane. I was trying to place him in some movie that I've seen but couldnt get where I've watched him act before. And then I realized that I recognize him from KnotsLanding.! Click on that and you'll realize Nicolette Sheridan from Desperate Housewives was also there. Some of the other soap operas that have tantalized Malaysian households

1) Dynasty - of the Carringtons & the Colbys..hehe

2) Dallas - Ewing Oil...ring a bell?

3) FalconCrest -Anyone watching The BOld and THe Beautiful? Recognize Lorenzo Lamas from this duddy soap

Thanks RTM- for bringing us these soaps that's still apparently deeply embedded in my mind. I'm somewhat slightly freaked.

What's Sexy?

Anyone heard Sexy Back from Justin Timberlake? Din sound that sexy to me...But define sexy. Tell me if this is sexy to u....
1) Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer in 24...
2) Michele Pfeiffer in Grease
3) Matthew McConaughey
4) Jude Law's blue eyes - see Alfie
5) Angelina Jolie's lips
6) Siti Nurhaliza
7) Clint Eastwood's frown
8) Sean Penn's smirk with a grin
9) Brooke Burke dolled up in Rockstar
10) Tommy Lee's tattoos...
11) Scarlet Johannson in Match Point
12) Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction
13) Kevin Costner in the Untouchables..
14) Jay Chou's almost-mata jeling (yucks)
15) Brad Pitt in Legend of the Falls...

16) Xiaoxue the Singaporean Blogger all tarted-up

Mentality #2

I just attended a Fire Drill cum Safety induction for the office building I work in, on what was supposed to be a briefing on the duties of a Fire Marshall (yes, I am a Fire Marshall), the evacuation process, instead what I experienced and learned were how MUTE the typical Malaysians are. We had had 2 bomb threats so far and this is no joking matter. Sorry to be rude, but one thing that really irks me is when these executives or management from the many Fortune 100-material-companies residing in the building, they stroll into the meeting hall, in their expensive suits or clothes, holding onto their fancy phone/PDA gadgets, armed with a professional look on their face, and yet, when the time comes for them to speak up, they, I’m guessing here, they either choose to remain MUTE for some weird reason or they choose to discuss among themselves what should really be a question posed to the very people who are giving us the CAUSE to question their ‘rational’ and since we are after all here in Malaysia, the very ‘intelligence’ of some of the outrageous IDEAS people have. Come on, it’s meaningless to chatter amongst yourselves and sometimes get worked-up over it, you need to tell them what your doubts and concerns are. Telling the friend sitting next to you is not going to do nuts. No, I can’t stand for it. I refuse to sit there and listen to people conducting these Fire-cum-Safety briefings who use HIGH-TECH power presentations but have very low quality in content. I choose to QUESTION! If anything, the briefing was downright kindergarten material, the speaker even said that we should not LEAVE our food in the building overnight because there are rats that scurry around and may cause electrical trips that will subsequently cause a FIRE! Goodness GRACIOUS me! I’m not sure to laugh or to be angry that these people think we need to be told of idiotic scenarios to prove their point. Anyhow, the crux of the matter is that these bozos will always be around, but let’s not keep QUIET, I think it’s like a disease we have here. I’m sometimes ashamed that only the foreigners dare to voice their opinions and the typical Malaysians just sit there and nod their heads in agreement. Let’s Speak Up, shall we!

Legalized Prostitution

Should prostitution in Malaysia be legalized....with regulation? Mandatory health checks? We cannot deny its existence and despite being illegal, it is a strong and lucrative business in Malaysia. So why not legalize it? Prostitution is legal in Nevada, New Zealand, Switzerland and several Australian states. What's your vote?

Happy Birthday !!

Happy Birthday to 2 wonderful friends. My life will never be the same without you guys. I love you both ... Ok, enough mushy stuff. Here goes

Tihtahpah spy

Types of self-defence items found in Malaysians' cars...
1) Rukun Tetangga ronda stick
2) Squash racquet (the old wooden type)
3) Tongkat
4) Gearlock
5) Wooden baseball bat
6) electric shock gun
7) Golf club
Wow...very imaginative, guys...

Spice in Language

Here's some of the 'spices' i have come across.....feast ur eyes...

1) GOONDU- although i was wondering if it should have been doongu

2) BASKET- I think i've been using this since i was probably 15....some ppl have modified it throughout the years of its existence to BASKETBALL..

3) FARKERS- more savvy than *$*&^-kers i suppose...

4) MCH- something i adopted when i was in university...i think i need not elaborate..well, my fren even made a song about this lovely 'spice'

5) DITCHAROO- for ditchers , also FFKers

6) NIASENG- anybody actually knows what chinese dialect is this?

7) FFK- Same as Ditcharoo..only that its easier to sms 'ffk' than the other-

8) TFK- go figure

9) SHIT!!!!!!!!- notice the exclamation marks..

10) Oi/Woi-good word to use when you can't remember the other person's name, besides it sounds much friendlier than HI, Hello..

11) ONS- probably started off in Singapore...where everyone talks in abbreviations..call me if you dont know what this means..

12) SMURF- okok..i admit..only I and certain ppl use this word..but i just needed this word to be here...maybe popularize it a bit..ahahhaa...can be used to describe a person as short or silly or weird or strange or stupid or goondu..very versatile

13) SIEN- Overused word in working life. Sien la today. Why so sien?

In truth, i doubt you can find a good, decent word to replace these words to best describe what you wanna convey or say. Kudos for whoever who created these!

P/S: Some common words are omitted because it's deemed to be too inappropriate

Urban Dictionary rocks!

How many of you have googled something, or even googled yourself? As most of you may already know this, the word 'google' has made its way to the dictionary. It took only 5 years after its first use in a New York Post article. According to statistics, it takes an average of 10-20 years of use before a word gets the dictionary status.

Lets wiki it and see what wikipedia have to say about google. Thats right, to 'wiki' something means to find something using wikipedia.org, the online encyclopedia. Kewl?

Have you also google earthed your home or school or workplace?

Or, would you like to Zidane that dude who just called you a brokeback?

Urban dictionary rocks !

What's the difference between a nerd, a geek and a dork?

Here, here and here are some pretty interesting findings. I guess only a geek would bother to find out what a geek is and how they measure with nerds and dorks ;)

Japanese Wannabes

This is a real Japanese. However, walking in Malaysian streets these days are Japanese wannabes. Just like any bad imitations, in their desperation to look Japanese, they looked pimped with tardy makeup, plenty of lip gloss, chunky accessories and bizarre clothes. It's either that or Taiwanese wannabes are beginning to sprout. Not only do they wanna dress like the Japanese but they try to instill a Kawaii culture in their daily doings. It's all too *$&(#*% cutesy for me.

My advice is ..JUST BE YOURSELF

Malaysian Women.....

Some of the Malaysian Women's Habits that I've noticed...

1) Whenever possible, they try not to drive...hitching rides from guys even if it's terribly not strategically economical....

2) late 20 somethings who act cutesy...ok, *slap in the idiot's face* GROW UP!

3) if you're gonna wear something sexy, make sure you can CARRY it off..if you're gonna be adjusting your bra, spaghetti strap, pull up your very-low-cut-top...might as well not wear it.

4) going to the loo in a group....seriously, when I need to go I would just GO,..and I really dont need 'escorts'...hahaha...but it's a girl thing I guess...nothing wrong with that...

5) wearing jammies to the pasar malam....no, this is totally not cool, very unbecoming, gross, how could you be sleeping in that after all the dust and germs stuck to the nightie...

6) some attached girls need to 'check' with their bfs before they can commit to an appointment.... it's good to be so close to your other half but to a point when HIS schedule becomes YOUR schedule, that's just pathetic.

7) women who don't eat when meeting for an outing...some girls show up for bfast/lunch/dinner and not eat...what's up with that?

Dodgy Drugs

My dad tried to get his prescription from his cardio doc because my dad can get drugs for free at the University Hospital since he was a government servant. Doc advised him saying that there is no guarantee that drugs from UH are GENUINE... aside from the fact that the doc wanna rip off my dad...quite shocking to hear that a doctor would say something like that to tarnish the entire medical system in Malaysia.

And just this morning I heard on the radio that the Health Dept is shocked to hear that the prescription drugs in Malaysia are MORE EXPENSIVE compared to drugs in developed countries....I wonder who's verifying the drugs' costs...who's benefiting..and why is our Health Dept not aware..

Hmmm....dodgy, don't u think?

When we are all but thankful..

Turning a year old never really meant much to me. It’s more often than not, just a much welcomed excuse for a get-together with close friends, whom amidst having to pitter-patter quickly in the rat race, had sometimes managed to forget to keep in touch or maybe just have not met each other as often as we had promised to, and yet it is your birthday that they take the pains to organize a time and place to meet-up, and sometimes throw in elements of surprise or in the form of booze? This is the exact reason, why the birthday person is more than grateful when their friends remember and try to give them a birthday celebration that will be as memorable and tantamount as a girl on her wedding day or a guy getting a pat on the back for a job well done from his father. Try as I might to think that it’s just another day, just another year old, just another blow off those candle(s), there are always people to remind me that having friends and family around you on this day is exactly the cause for happiness, for jubilation even, at the thought that people are really that nice and perhaps they think that you are nice enough for them to put in that effort to wish you a very happy birthday. I distinctively remember how sullen and really sad I had been one birthday when I was far away from home, not among my friends, instead I was working, in a city strange to me, and surrounded by what you would call the rough working class, of burly chefs and sharp-tongued men. Picked up my tiny spirit and blew it up like a hot air balloon, by downing just a wee bit of sake, a stolen drink really. And the day passed me by like a breeze, with a joy-brimmed smile plastered on my face. Towards the end of tired feet and aching backs, the boss had turned the “Closed” sign about an hour earlier than should, and gathered us all around. Imagine my surprise when a cake made out of sashimi delicates, spelling out the words Happy Birthday, XXX (the name I had gone by then), were put out right before me and the chef had broken out in a birthday song in Korean. Tempura, dragon and avocado rolls, and free flow beer were accompaniments of this wonderfully unexpected birthday treat. I even had my first cosmopolitan on this very day, compliments of the ever-‘green’ bartender.

This year around, I had another wonderful surprise. For this, it will be marked along with that one before as an eternally memorable birthday. Probably this is not what you would call a general post, suitable for a blog of our genre, but I hope to “inspire” (haha) sentiments of a ‘caring society’ (*eyes rolling*) and to remind us of the joys found in the simplest of gestures.

Car Giants...

BMW says....

Audi says...
Proton says...

Some guys are ...

... the predators. They hop from one girl to another. They could ask a girl out right after a break up. If they're single, their radar is always ON and actively detecting for potentials. Every girl they see is a prey. They're not afraid to show their interest in you and express their feelings openly - which is suppose to be a good thing. Well, provided that they don't do this to EVERY girl they see! They master in the art of sweet talking.

... the lurkers. They secretly admire and/or send gifts anonymously. But why? Perhaps they are shy? Afraid of rejection? But isn't not doing anything as bad as being rejected? My motto is: If you wanna be anonymous, you may as well stay anonymous for the rest of my life! :D

... the mysterious ones. They seem to show interest but they don't ask you out. What's the deal with that? They feed you with some love, then leave you craving for more. Are they too experienced and realistic to know that jumping into a relationship too fast is not a good thing? Are they still checking off their wish list? Perhaps they know you're going crazy with that and that's what they wanna do.

... the tihtahpah. These are usually quality men. They know what they want in their life. Their schedule is normally packed, no time for crap talk or crap business. They know exactly what kind of women they want. If they get to meet them, good. If not, it's not a show stopper. They indulge in enough activities/sports/hobbies to keep them occupied for the rest of their lives!


So ... which one are you?

Malaysian men.....

Hard to find Malaysian men who....

1) Opens the door for you...

2) Walks you to your car...

3) is always on time...

4) doesn't boast...

5) doesn't drool looking at pretty women...

Creative Business

Most Malaysian I think , sit around and try to churn out new business ideas...who doesn't wanna make a quick buck right? But it always boils down to NO capital..but good ideas nevertheless....

1) Concept Tours- NY has its Kramer tour, Sex & the City Tour, Malaysia can have its Eating Tour, Nightlife Tour, Penang-Eats-Only Tour, Beach Tour, History Tour, Jungle Tour basically...customers can customize their tours to their specific budget and specific locations they wanna cover

2) Men's Grooming Center - I think fashion would eventually catch up in Malaysia..women are already doing great but Malaysian men Makeovers might come in handy in future.

3) Drive-Thru Cinema- Ok..we don't have this and remember how well Starlight Cinema in Bukit Kiara did? People didn't mind sitting on the padang...This idea calls for a big piece of land though.

4) Drive-Thru Ramly Burger & Cendol/Ais Kacang Combo - You'll be surprised how Malaysians like these kinda things..a lot of KL people know about the infamous Ipoh drive-thru soyabean stall. Definitely beat the McDonald's drivethru. Honestly, most Malaysian prefer Ramly Burger, just that there's usually no seating area.

5) Coffee City- Basically a big Coffee hub - specializes in international array of coffee beans for coffee lovers- served with biscotti and chocolates. Only pay entrance fees. Customers can even brew their own coffee. It has to be as big as Nike City. The fad might fade, but then you can always switch to Tea City :)

Can think of any?

That's so Passe.....

It's passe....to

1) have your t-shirt collars upturned...rockstar mehhh

2) know only English......everyone's going global, need to be multi-lingual or Mandarin-speaking. People in Taiwan can speak English/Mandarin/Japanese with language schools at every corner of Taipei.

3) go for buffet......everyone's going 'organic' now and people are getting more health-conscious

4) use icq.....there's skype and msn

5) be a virgin..... pre-marital sex is necessary

6) watch TVB series.....hullo? Reality tv shows are invading the tv time

7) have a Bachelor degree.....most people get Master's degree/MBA. there are currently 56 MBAprogrammes in China alone.

8) only read newspapers....because of information sharing and globalisation, more & more people are sourcing elsewhere for faster, more ACCURATE news in websites, news media, blogs, magazines..etc

Malaysians bad habits

This is of no particular order...............
1) Spitting - generally men will unwind their car windows and spit...or spit when they're walking..or spit after smoking.
2) Talking on the phone in the cinema. I think the cinema ppl ought to remove these ppl from the cinema for other people's sake. I say, impose a fine!
3) Jaywalking. Just go to Old Klang Road...I swear, one day I might just 'accidentally' knock them down.
4) Talking loudly on the cellphone. Seriously..is this really necessary? Or does our telecommunication providers suck?
5) Salesgirl following u around. I just wonder if this happens in other countries...coz I dont have this problem when I travel to other countries.
6) Digging your nose when driving. OK...this is so disgusting and it applies to women and men.
7) Not Queueing up!...ok, some older people thinks it's their prerogative to cut queues...well, it's not..other younger people's time are just as precious as any older person's.
8) Farting in public. No..this is not cool. Even if there is only 1 person around...
9) Wearing t-shirts and shorts into the pool. Hygeine ranks very low in Malaysian people's priority. Stop bringing your germs into the public pool ok.
10) LATE for an appointment. It doesn't matter if it's a wedding, funeral, a meeting, whatever, ...i've had friends who'll be late for 2 freaking hours...
GOT ANY?

E-mail boo-boos or no?

Here are some examples of phrases that I often see in emails. Not sure whether they are correct to use. Any feedback would be great.

1. “Please advice”. Should it not be “Please advise”. The same goes with “I need your advise”, should it not be “I need your advice”.
2. “Please do the needful”. Sounds weird, though I think the sentence could be correct. But why can’t we just use “Please do what is necessary/required”. Simpler isn’t it?
3. “Enclosed herein is..” or “ Enclosed herewith is..”. I usually just have “Please find this enclosed”. Think that’s good enough?
4. “Please double confirm” and “Please double check”. Seems so mahfan.. why need to double everything?
5. “As per conversation with your goodself..” Seems very assuming, how do I know if you’re really good, saintly-halo-on-the-head good? I know it’s correct, but I find it awkward, pretending ppl are good.. come on. “As per conversation with yourself..” should suffice?
6. “What you reckon?” I thought it should be “What do you reckon?” No?
7. “..Should be able to shed some lights.” HAHA, I think this is obvious.
8. “Kindly revert to us”. Revert is to go back to a former condition, rite? Or to reverse something? Seems really strange though I admit it's widely used.

Of Kelings and Bengalis

Did you know that it's degrading to call someone Keling, but it's alright to use Keling Kia? And did you know that Bengali is a language and also refers to an ethnic group Bengalipeople?

Defying the Laws of Comedy

Best of Still Photojournalism 2004-for Magazine Portrait & Personality category. That's Jim Carrey :)

The Cheena-Man Attitude

1. They never read their emails and will tell you that the emails you sent are lost in cyberspace so as to avoid claiming responsibility for a required action or any other form of liabilities.

Counter attack: Request for a read-receipt. Or call them up and read the whole email aloud and remember to jot down the date and time. Make sure they understand what you say though. May have to repeat a few times to get message across.

2. Their commercial mantra is to ALWAYS ask for a DISCOUNT. Even 5% would be good. Sometimes they will call you and disguise their motive by asking you technically-duhh questions or they end up not really listening anyways. They will tell you that other competitors are giving lower pricing than you are and that others' deliveries are better.
Counter attack: Mark up the price/quote you are giving them. Perhaps 15% so you end up making at least 5-10%? :D

3. If you work with these people and it’s your first day, expect to perform menial tasks like making coffee, printing copies, filing, sending boss’ car for service, among other things. They’ll tell you it’s to help you familiarize yourself with the office surroundings but really, they just want to ‘hup’ you.
Counter attack: Feign stupidity or ignorance. Mention what you have been doing in your weekly meetings or a chanced how-are-you-getting-along question from your boss, casually and tactfully, of course.

4. Be prepared to have discussions in Cantonese/Mandarin/Hokkien. Have nothing against this except they’d have to watch out if there are colleagues who don’t speak the language.
Counter attack: learn the language, if you can. Can’t? Remind them that there are those who don’t understand the language. If your business-needs tend to sway towards the use of Chinese, fine. But if not, you can’t stop them as they are probably the majority. Suggest you find a non-cheena working environment.. hahha

5. They will promise you the moon and the stars when you ask them something but they can’t even make it to the appointment on-time.
Counter attack: Pretty obvious that whatever they promise needs to be in black and white. If they are late for the appointment, refuse to see them or walk out. Time is gold.

6. They expect their lowly-paid employees to work long hours, as long as it takes to get the work done although they have the means to hire an extra hand. They believe those who work the longest hours are the most hardworking employees.
Counter attack: If you have already done what you’re supposed to do, go home. If everyone does this, then they would know better than to exploit their employees.

*Extremities are taken as examples here.. no offence taken i hope.

The Singleton as a Friend

The Singleton is....

1.The Hidden Friend -As a female singleton, i brand myself as the Hidden Friend. So many a times, i'll be caught animated in a conversation with a fellow guy friend, when all of a sudden, he gets a phone call - and always its the girlfriend. So first question from the gf would be "Where and who u with?". I'm always

a) Just some customer laaaa

b) supplier...

c) just a friend...male..(irregardless that i am acquainted with the gf)

d) yumcha kaki onli

2. The Last Minute Friend -Again, the concept that singletons are always free, makes it easy for their friends to make last minute plans with the singletons. And there's never a worry if the other party needs to check if the gf/bf is free or not, whether the gf/bf minds if they go out, whether they have transport or not. Singletons are always mobile!!! Ever on the go.

3. The Organizer -Singletons are always appointed as organizers for bday parties, drinking sessions, dinner sessions, mamak sessions...just because people always assume singletons have more time or they dont need to consult/report to their spouses/bf/gf. People dont see that it actually gives the singletons the chance to plan the sessions AROUND their schedule.

4. The Aunt Agony- Singletons are always there to lend a shoulder to cry on, or to knock some sense in some really screwed up, bastardic, silly friends. Just ask yourself, how many attached friends would actually sit down with you, walk through ur problems with you, sit through a really long lonngggg mamak session..Comparatively, singletons have more TIME TO SPARE for their friends.

Aiyoh!!

Malaysia's most overused English words/phrases

1) Actually (Actually ar, she.....)

2) Already (I finish already..) usually pronounced to sound like 'oredi' or 'a-dy'

3) Don't want (I don't want it already)

4) No problem (No problem, don't worry)

5) ..and then? ( yar yar...and then? and then?)

6) ...brother... (Eh, brother! * with a slam on the fella's shoulder*)

Malaysia's most overused Malay words/phrases

1) Bos, kira! -widely used at the mamak

2) Amoi - word I hate the most- in reference to a Chinese girl

Malaysia's most common known Cantonese slangs (used even by the Malays and Indians)

1) Kautim - means completed

2) Ngam - means good rapport/relationship

Malaysia's most overused Tamil words

1) Aaa neh - in reference to a person older than you

2) Thamby - in reference to a person younger than you

Malaysia's most overused Hukkien slangs- think I can't post it here..mostly vulgar :)

And finally AHBUHTHEN: a manifestation of English + Hukkien usually used to mock people

kuai lo kopitiam treats ...

To be honest, I'm not a big fan of doughnuts. In fact, I hate doughnuts. I wouldn't touch any regular doughnuts BUT for some reason, I just LOVE Krispy Kreme. Why? I don't know, they're just different! How can I call myself a doughnut hater and yet succumb to Krispy Kreme?? I simply don't know !!!

The 4 phases of life ...

Canada's Kopitiam

Sometimes I really think that the cafes flourishing in KL are really not that good and way overpriced. On average, in some unknown cafe in KL with crummy decor and lousy brew is charging about RM8 for a cup of coffee. Over at TIMHORTONS, what I dub as Canada's Kopitiam, I can get a fantastic caffeine fix for CA$1.29. This average kopitiam is also conveniently located everywhere, it's clean, and..migosh...you really have to see the selection of muffins, donuts, timbits, croissants that they offer.

And I dunno about you, but I've always liked my coffee in a mug. They also have iced cappucino that downs well during the summer. It is really a very simple concept of kopitiam that people at all levels can go to.

And the muffins..well, they are phenomenal..I can have it everyday, my favourite being the Oatmeal Raisin :) Anyone can intro a good cafe in KL?

Best Coffee

Best coffee is no doubt Ipoh White Coffee. Starbucks can step aside. This coffee gives me the spell...the craving...and the best coffee experience. Get the authentic one at this kopitiam in Ipoh Old Town. Guaranteed satisfaction..

And it's served like this in Ipoh..with some spills on the saucer ..and foam on the top. Served with kaya toast...Truly Ipohian style.

Give me my Beano!

I don't know about you guys but I can distinctively remember growing up reading loads of Enid Blyton, The Famous Five, Nancy Drew, Secret Seven & The Hardy Boys-things deemed to be too corny now. But somehow, back then there was always some BEANO mags lying around, which is kinda strange considering that it's a Brit children's comic. I would read and reread the adventures of Dennis the Menace and his dog Gnasher(who goes *gnash gnash*, Minnie the Minx and the Bash Street Kids. I always thought it was better than Archie & Friends (it's too lame). ANyone remember the Dandy, it was the first one before? Well, just a jog down the memory lane.... visit BEANOTOWN

Napoleon Dynamite

I can't even begin to describe this 2004 movie, it's quirky, funny without trying at all, hilarious, a unique movie one of its kind. Jon Heder makes a convincing nerd called Napoleon,,,love his curly hair and awkward self.....right up to his incredible danceperformance....The other characters compliments him well, check out Pedro...I love it that it portrays real-life people..you know, those zombie-like people who are quiet, a little odd, with the can't-be-bothered look...I'm sure once you've seen this movie, you'll realize that yo someone like Napoleon, Kip, Uncle Rico, Summer, Pedro would have crossed your path. The movie takes you to an unpredictable journey in the life of Napoleon Dynamite...who's out to prove he's got nothing to prove!

PS: This movie won MTV Movie Awards best movie and Jon Heder (Napoleon) won Best Breakthrough Male....he was paid only USD1000 for this role

Watch Out...Double Parkers!!!

If there's one thing I hate about Malaysian drivers is that they double park...and they think it's alright to double park! Ask any KL drivers and any can relate to you a honking-like-mad-coz-a-car-double-parked-behind-my-car experience! The worst thing is that these double parkers when they get to their car, they give unpleasant remarks as if it is our fault that we're so impatient and angry over nothing.
Often the reasons for double parking are:
1) double parker went to 'tarpau' some food
2) double parker went to pay bills at the post office
3) double parker can't find parking so conveniently double park because he/she is in a rush
4) double parker is lazy to walk and because there is no nearest parking to the mamakstall/kopitiam, double parker rather just double park and be on a lookout in case need to remove car from double parking spot.
5) double parker went to buy 4-D, Toto, etc
6) double parker is too stingy to fork out few cents for parking since he/she wont be 'long'
I realize that double parking happens everywhere...even in Bangkok where double parking is a norm..people double park and leave their handbrakes down in Chatuchak and the shopping malls. AT least Bangkok ppl are considerate while Malaysians seems to think it is their RIGHT to double park.
Next double parker i see- expect some total damage on your vehicle.

Finally...Revamp on Education!

Revamp! article has really made my day. Ex corporate figures and civil servants would be reabsorbed into the education system. Having been in the Malaysia education cycle some years back, I really applaud this move. I've had 5 years in secondary school of many "DIY" or "Masa Sendiri" sessions where the teacher/relief teachers would be reading newspapers, cutting their nails, chatting with the "ampu" students while the rest of us are running amok in the classroom. Back in those days, we embraced happily this little 'arrangement' sometimes even collaborating with the teachers, we didnt know better...now when I look back, we've wasted so much time...
But really to make this work, someone's gotta look into the salary scale. See salaryreview . Really much rather have the 4.8bil allocated for upgrading credible teachers' salary than for upgrading police welfare. At least we've had SOME good teachers in the past. Anyone can name one credible policeman?

And let's not forget about some of the retired teachers already reabsorbed back into the system. Let's ensure the SELECTION CRITERIA for all levels (primary/secondary/university) are CLEAR to avoid any confusion amongst the teachers. Credentials are important so that the students can respect the teachers. Downfall on the Education system is that students like us, over the years, have lost respect and faith for the teachers.
Perhaps next time, we can have schools like SchoolofRock ?? Just kidding, although some variety of schools available would be most welcomed :)

Who's Protecting Who?

4.8bilforpolice? cites of RM4.8bil allocation to the Police force. First of all, what police workforce? DO you consider them as a genuine police force? Some people consider them as bullies and opportunists. And not so long ago, there was a big hoo-haa on the earsquat scandal..still fresh in many 'rakyat''s minds. I have lost faith, really. The RM4.8bil is supposedly to improve the quality and efficiency of the police workforce...so why is the fund used for improving police welfare on housing and logistics? What about eliminating the so called 'few' bad apples, see badapples... ?? Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Bakri Omar states that the funds would be used to handle narcotic cases more efficiently by using new technology such as SMS. SMS???? You need 4.8bil for that? And, to improve the efficiency of the police force, all they could come up with is SMS? No other more substantial ideas? I can't imagine my neighbourhood policeman diligently sms-ing to report on a 'dadah' case... Didn't someone raise the question of who's gonna ensure that these bad apples don't strike? Who's gonna protect the rakyat from the so called 'crimebusters'? And..btw, wasn't RM365mil already allocated for the CCTV (yet another superfluous measure) cctv?? What gives?

Back Off!

coliseumcinema . First... take away the man's 2 pieces of land...then, impose the Land Acquisition Act to take away his family legacy...then give him 30 days to evacuate.....& THEN they have the cheek to say that they're willing to negotiate to lease it from him and saying 'it could be a good marriage' ? If there was no vast public outcry, would there have been this lease plan? Why didn't that come up in the first place before instructing an old man to leave in 30 days? Even if the reasons for acquiring the Coliseum was in fact noble and to preserve the culture- have the decency to layout a proposal and negotiate with Dr. Chua. That's how civilized people do things. Think before you Act.

Protect yourself. Read WhatisLandAcquisitionAct

My Weakness (5)

Since we're at it, I may as well recommend this, it's even in Wikipedia! It's multi-grain chips and it's suppose to be an 'excellent' source of whole grains. My favourite is the harvest cheddar when my system craves for ever so yummy MSG :)

Apple-chips, baked-chips, low fat chips, multi-grain chips - Aren't they all bs? I think chips are just as healthy as chips can be period.

My Weakness (4)

I have recently discovered that it's available at Sri Kota (near Tmn Desa)..used to get some from Singapore. It's really expensive though, about RM6.99 but it's APPLE CHIPS! ALMOST-HEALTHY SNACKING!

If Only ...

If only the world is free from war, poverty, disease epidemics, catastrophes, terrorism, corruption, homicides, robberies, scandals ...

And all you see in the headlines is this. Are we ever going to get to this day? ...

My Weakness (3)

NOTHING BEATS KETTLE CHIPS (honey DIJON)...

My weakness...(2)

These are my favourites. Can't go wrong with Miss Vickie's ...

What Gives?

Anyone seen ANY Sunsilk ad ? Sunsilk Tell me what's the logic....*eyes rolling*

So It Has Come to This.....

So, Mr. KJ is going to release a list of companies supporting the Israel regime Israelcomp. For what purpose if I may ask? So the 'rakyat' can make a choice of either to boycott these products /services or not. Following this, I'll have to do without my IBM pc, McDonald's, my weekly dose of Starbucks, my Nokia phone...wow..I'm gonna really have to re-invent my whole lifestyle. That's according to our Umno Youth leader...hmmm..i think not. What about this list? DinarStandard. What about the rest of the non-UMNO Youth followers? They're gonna have to abide and change their lifestyle based on this list? And here we are going towards Vision 2020, when everything's about globalisation and innovation....and we have to abide to these rules? Let's move forward.....not backwards.

My weakness...

Forget fancy-smancy chips or stylo-milo crisps.. give me this "kerepek ubi pedas" anytime..

Better than TVB series...........anytime (4)

Remember this one? ... I just remembered that Johnny Depp was in one of my childhood tv shows, I had to use google to help dig out the title of the show from my rusty little long term memory. 21 JUMPSTREET !! Remember that Nguyen guy too ? :)

Cocktails...(3)

Alabama Slammer......
Shake the whisky, gin, triple sec and Galliano with the cracked ice. Strain and pour. Top up with the orange juice. Garnish with the cherry and orange slice.













Making Your Own B-52
Just shake Grand marnier, Bailey's Irish Cream and Kahlua with ice....

does google really work?

How many times have you tried to google a 'how to ...' and 8 out of 10 results are some stupid ad pages that says '10 important tricks on how to ...' buy this best seller for only $9.99, shipping is free ! ...

SHUDDER..

Another heartbreaking news of yet another female raped and murdered in Malaysia. Read the news here. My heartfelt condolences to the families of these victims. We hope that the culprits will be caught somehow (amidst corruption and apathy that seems to distress the average 3rd world country) and the sooner the better. Let’s all be very AWARE of these incidents. We have received enough forwarded e-mails of recommended safety measures, alerts on dodgy cars or vans (some even with the car license numbers) and even pictures of the alleged criminals. Take them seriously if you have not and with a pinch of salt if you must for the exaggerated ones.

Here’s some Car Safety measures I picked off the net, may or may not be useful:-
1. Always keep windows rolled up and doors locked after entering or leaving your car.
2. Always have your car keys in your hand so you can get into your car immediately.
3. Always check the back seat before entering your car.
4. Never leave your keys in your car, even if you will only be gone a moment.
5. Never leave your purse in sight, hide it under your seat or in the glove compartment.
6. When parking, look for any suspicious persons loitering before leaving your car.
7. Always park in well-lighted areas.
8. If you’re being followed by another car, NEVER DRIVE HOME. Honk your horn in short bursts to attract attention and drive to a gas station, police or fire department.
9. Always keep your car in good running condition with at least half a tank of gas.
10. If your car breaks down, pull over to the right as far as possible, raise the hood, and wait inside for help. Do not get out of the car or unroll the window until the police arrive.
11. Do not pick up hitchhikers.

Though these are only recommendations but I should think they serve as somewhat good guidelines in which we can learn to safeguard ourselves. It’s true that sometimes it’s a matter of fate and luck, but surely it's up to us to minimize our risks. Stay Safe people..

Be Mindful of What You Say

Malaysiaunhappy? This article bugs me. The fact that what that one person says is quoted as what Malaysia says. Politicians/Ministers don't realize that what they say or do inevitably reflects on the "rakyat". The fact that i found this MalaysiaPoliticians in Youtube, it's kinda saddens me what the general people in the world must think of us Malaysians. Politicians slander one another using harsh and crude language, what kind of example are they setting for the younger ones. Imagine them watching that. It's kinda sad when I do know of actually decent, polite, intelligent and tactful people amongst the 'rakyat' who are more if not better mannered than these politicians. Please leave us out of this shame. We're better than that.

THE INTERVIEW...

PAKLAHTELLSALL The 'rakyat' tuned in to watch Bernama chairman, Datuk AZ interviewing our PM. We waited in anticipation as the agenda looked intriguing enough- PM breaking his silence. I was expecting a fulfilling and reassuring interview..but maybe I was expecting too much. The issues were addressed alright...without little affirmation. The interview seemed staged with the AL-Quran quotes, football metaphors.... For an interview to be successful, interviewer must always counter question the interviewee based on possible answers that he would have layed out before the interview, but No, Datuk AZ simply obliged and seemed contented with ALL the answers...nodded and moved on to the next questions obediently. I say, if you want to make a staged interview, do it right, don't patronize the 'rakyat'.
PS: can we please end the spat between our PM and the ex-PM? Seems rather childish now that it has dragged this long. And...an applause to our PM's 'no comment' on this issue. We dont want our leaders wasting time in front of the journalist making spats that has no beneficial effect to the 'rakyat'.
Just as expected..a sequel to this interview, check this Mahathir's reply...and so the plot thickens. Expect some "kacau-bilau"....

Better than TVB series...........anytime (3)

Here's Macgyver for you. ANYONE KNOWS WHAT"S THE NAME OF THE DOG??

Ipoh Bites

Being a true Ipoh-ian, I feel it is my duty to inform that the best Shredded Chicken Hor Fun in Ipoh is NOT at Onn Kee Restaurant or Lou Wong Restaurant....it is for a fact that the best one is in Cowan Street (only opens for lunch). Second choice would be the stall at the Kong Heng Kopitiam.

Sake??

Nope..I'm not a sake enthusiast...I only had it because it was free during my waitressing days in New Jersey. Once a month we would have sake-tasting sessions and wine-tasting sessions..i was in glee. Our 'teacher" would teach us how to describe the sake and at what temperature it should be served. Visit typesofsake for different classification of sake. After the session, where we were all half drunk, we were told that we get USD1 for every bottle of sake/wine we sell. That seemed a lot at that time :)


For the untrained sake drinkers, I always recommended this one : Meibo YowanaTsuki- Junmai Ginjyo sake. For one thing, the bottle looks nice and the sake is light with a mineral and fruity feel.
My bartender then..he gets a little creative sometimes and take a bit of this sake to make a Sake-Tini..garnished with cucumber.




It's kinda odd but in Jersey City where I worked, the gwailos are sticklers to their favourite food or drink. They'll come in week after week having the same stuff - irregardless what the specials were. And there was one particular customer, who told me he was in the Vietnam war(showed me his scars...cool) and he always had the Otokoyama. It was kinda dry and burns slightly.

I knew my "sake" days were over when I came back here. You can actually get sake at Jaya Jusco but I've sniffed for some info from the Japs living here that the selection is not so good- plus it's way overpriced. Think I'll just stick to regular beer.....!

Cocktails....(2)

Here's a different perspective of cocktails- using micrography (photography with microscope). It's an absolutely beautiful way of looking at TEQUILA SUNRISE....
Mix of 1 1/2 ounces of tequila, 3/4 ounce of Grenadine, and 4 ounces of orange juice and voila!

And a tribute to the Japs- this Cocktail micrography is the Kamikaze. (ingredients are: ounce of vodka, 1 ounce of Triple Sec, and 1 ounce of lime juice)........

You can't get more creative with Cocktails than this.... :)

Cocktail dig of the week......MOJITO!

The original Cuban Mojito is with light rum, whereelse the Drink of 2006 would be the new Mojito with Bacardi..... see this link mojito on how to make...*booze on*